January 22. On this date in 1992, an individual wrote the UHJ, who later responded that "The House of Justice was sorry to learn from your letter that your son has recently informed you that he is a homosexual...You will, no doubt, want to urge your son to seek appropriate counseling..."

 

January 22. On this date in 1992, an individual wrote the UHJ, who later responded that "The House of Justice was sorry to learn from your letter that your son has recently informed you that he is a homosexual...You will, no doubt, want to urge your son to seek appropriate counseling..."

Responding to Homosexuality 1 MARCH 1992

To an individual Bahá’í

Dear Bahá’í Friend,

Your letter of 22 January 1992 has been received by the Universal House of Justice, and we are to provide the following response.

The House of Justice was sorry to learn from your letter that your son has recently informed you that he is a homosexual. It commends your attitude of compassion and your efforts to both maintain harmony in your marriage and to keep open the lines of communication to your son. In answer to your specific question, there is little in the Bahá’í writings that specifically points to the causes of homosexuality itself, but as the House of Justice has emphasized in past letters to individuals who sought its advice on this question, there is much that concerns the nature of man, his inner life and growth, and the way to a true Bahá’í life. In a letter to an individual believer, the beloved Guardian, Shoghi Effendi, gave the following advice:

No matter how devoted and fine the love may be between people of the same sex, to let it find expression in sexual acts is wrong. To say that it is ideal is no excuse. Immorality of every sort is really forbidden by Bahá’u’lláh, and homosexual relationships He looks upon as such, besides being against nature.

To be afflicted this way is a great burden to a conscientious soul. But through the advice and help of doctors, through a strong and determined effort, and through prayer, a soul can overcome this handicap.

God judges each soul on its own merits. The Guardian cannot tell you what the attitude of God would be towards a person who lives a good life in most ways, but not in this way. All he can tell you is that it is forbidden by Bahá’u’lláh, and that one so afflicted should struggle and struggle again to overcome it. We must be hopeful of God's mercy but not impose upon it.[1]

In general, the House of Justice urges you to avoid dwelling on thoughts of guilt which you, as a parent, would likely experience, and to continue to demonstrate love and acceptance toward your son; such an attitude, however, should imply no agreement with his attitude towards homosexuality. You will, no doubt, want to urge your son to seek appropriate counseling; in this connection you are encouraged to seek the assistance of your National Spiritual Assembly, which has often dealt with such cases, and can most probably assist you in identifying individuals who are experienced in this area and whose views on homosexuality are basically compatible with those of the Bahá’í Faith.

Regarding your husband's refusal to permit your son to return home, it is understandable that a parent might feel deeply confused and angry when confronted with such questions which go to the very root of what it means to be a human being and what it means to educate and raise a child. Prayer, faith in God, loving consultation and patience will aid you to deal with this difficulty. As for your family members who are causing you further anguish, it is perhaps also to be expected that reactions to such inherently perplexing questions, nowadays compounded more than ever by the general disarray in moral thinking, tend toward extremes, either of resignation or condemnation. You are obliged to hew your own course, as illuminated by the teachings of Bahá’u’lláh. Whether you can persuade anyone of the correctness of your responses, which seek to preserve your relationship to your son and also to avoid alienating your husband, is secondary; the main thing is that you strive to deal with these difficulties in a manner consistent with the spirit of the Cause of God, which is neither harsh and maledictory nor excessively liberal and forbearing.

Be assured of the ardent prayers of the House of Justice at the Sacred Threshold that your marriage may be fortified and that your son may be divinely guided and assisted to overcome the problem which has beset him. It will also offer prayers that you may have the strength and wisdom to deal with this problem.

With loving Bahá’í greetings,DEPARTMENT OF THE SECRETARIAT

[1] LG, no. 1223.